Pregnancy can be a time when you learn a lot about yourself. New experiences lead to strange, convoluted emotions. Some of those emotions can even be a little unsettling. We’re here to tell you they’re normal! Here are four weird feelings common among pregnant women that we — nevertheless — rarely talk about.
"Who am I, even?"
Are you laughing hysterically one minute and sobbing the next? Do you want to scream and throw dishes, maybe at your spouse (because why does he insist on breathing so loudly!)? Do you feel totally helpless, then chipper five minutes later?
Wild mood swings are common among pregnant women--you never know what’s coming up next on the wheel of emotions! It can be incredibly frustrating not knowing what emotions your body will conjure up next. It can feel like you’re possessed, like you’re no longer in control of your own body [1].
Go easy on yourself and have compassion and patience with whatever moods swing through. It can be helpful to talk about it with other women who are or have been pregnant, as well as with friends who love you and understand the physical stress you’re under [1].
"Can we call this off?"
Guess what? Not all expectant mamas enjoy pregnancy. It’s not that they’ve changed their mind about the baby, but they miss life before pregnancy [1].
Many women are embarrassed that they feel this way and don’t feel comfortable talking about it. Reality check: pregnancy is hard, and there is nothing wrong with disliking the experience. It’s also hard to transition to a completely different life as a parent. It’s perfectly normal to miss the way things were. It does not mean you’ll be a bad mom or an unhappy one [1].
Instead of keeping these feelings to yourself, try journaling or drawing. These are two of many great activities you can use to process your feelings [2].
"I can’t believe it’s a boy"
So you were absolutely convinced baby is a girl, and then the ultrasound revealed it’s a boy. But even after looking at that picture, you can’t adjust. You just know it’s a girl!
Weird, right? But it happens. You spend a lot of time thinking about baby while you’re pregnant. Makes sense. And you end up having some pretty detailed thoughts and daydreams about baby, too. When reality contradicts those pictures in your head, it’s hard to come to terms with this new information. It’s not uncommon.
Know that your baby will not be anything like what you’re picturing. He or she will be their own person, infinitely complex and beautiful. You’ll have the best time getting to know them, learning with them and growing alongside them. Reality will trump any daydreams [1].
"I thought I knew my parents!"
You may not see this coming, but your parents may not respond to the news of a grandchild the way you think they will! Sometimes they are surprisingly aloof, nosey and over-involved, generous and supportive, or pretty much absent.
What’s going on? Your pregnancy is making them adjust, too. Their child is now having a child. They might begin to reminisce about all the stages of your life. Those memories might come with regrets, nostalgia, tenderness, and other feelings. They may also start to think about their own aging and mortality. This may cause them to pull closer, or to buy an RV and start traveling cross-country, leaving you totally confused.
Whatever their response, this is a good time to start thinking about healthy boundaries. Whether they want to come over every day or don’t check in with you much at all, take some intentional time to decide what their role will be in your child’s life [1].
